Patience


That is a hard battle to beat. I have challenged myself so much, on so many levels and have been defeated almost every time. It doesn't matter what task I try to master, point blank I have a weak level of patience.

The latest is my trying to avoid accessing luxury items and entertainment. I tossed DSL for limited dial up. :arrg: Well... I won't throw in the towel and say I can't do it, but it's been very hard. I also have cell phone access to my email and IM, But it's not the same. (((sigh))) The dial up is so much slower. Most pages don't even load, or do so at the speed equivalent of elephant gestation.

I decided to also suspend my satellite connection for 6 months in an attempt to honestly apply the payments elsewhere, primarily to diminish some of my credit card debt. Nothing is past due or over the limit, I'm just trying to make room for my major purchase of the year. A front loading washer and dryer set. No ... nothing is wrong with the one I have now, it's just not the one I want now! I guess I'm actually wanting to "SEE" the clothes getting clean, lol.


Giving up the satellite wasn't as hard. I have sooooo many movies and most of them, I haven't even seen yet. Those along with the past time favorites, have kept me entertained. Not to mention the long list of regular television broadcast shows/series that I have NEVER seen. I've never been one to follow any particular sitcom, soap opera, etc. My book library can use a tad more attention also, So this one is in the bag. I don't miss it at all.

I am a compulsive shopper also, and would have to make a purchase of some sort, every time I leave the house. But I actually left home and returned empty handed a few times within the last few weeks. For me, that is an amazing accomplishment.

However, it's only been about 3 weeks since the cut backs. I've had relapses but I'm not giving up. I want to be more patient. I can be more patient. I WILL BE PATIENT!

(((sigh)))

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