Emotions


Hey y'all, I just had to fill you in. If you know me personally, you know that I am usually a solidity of emotion. I express fully with a series of awe's and oh's and what the f^&*'s. I can be watching a movie and would sob to the point of zero visibility. I can be cut off in traffic and want to literally follow the perp home and behead his/her entire family and make promises to scare the shit out of the next generation. But lately since I've been umm "orally sedated" (yea - we'll call it that) I am just a happy lil bundle of giggles, smiles, patience and understanding. I laugh out loud and although I haven't watched a tear jerker in a couple of weeks, I haven't done much or no... any crying. I was even cut off in traffic a week ago and my response was, "whew - good takeover/lane change" I went on thinking to myself that, hey he was really smooth with that and look at em go. I knew immediately that I'd found something that can perhaps tame me. I sure hope so. It isn't a pleasant feeling to get so upset and then express it like a rabid animal. I didn't mind the crying so much with movies but when I break into a collar of tears simply because someone says a kind word to me was a bit much. I enjoy being a sweet person but not to the point of catchin a cavity with it. You know the person that nothing bothers him/her, nothing throws em off their square. Now don't get me wrong, I love being my defensive lil self, but that should be my secret weapon and not an unavoidable one. So the moral of the story is - with "additives" I'm not shaken or stirred; just taking it all in, processing and handling it a little better.

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