Chance to Enhance

Handle With Care

2012-02-07T16:28:00.002-06:00

Dear Reader

I am pleased to inform you that you are accepted. You are very much appreciated and highly valued. I'm sure you get down sometimes; the majority of us do. Of course you've done some things in your lifetime that was against your better judgement. Perhaps told a lie or two. Cheated on a test, stolen something, maybe worse than that.

Just when you thought you were all alone, even if you thought no one cares; remember someone always does. So what if no one speaks to you all day. No one calls, knocks or writes. You've spent days ill and no one even knew. You've conquered your biggest feat and there's no one to tell.

Guess what, I care that you're here reading this. I care that you find me interesting enough to share your time with me. I care that you may find this at a time when the words will settle in and make sense or a big difference to you. But even if I didn't, or no one else appears to reach out, as long as YOU care, You'll be just fine. Don't ever forget about YOU and someone will always be there. That someone is You.

Gratefully Yours
The Author

Who IS That?

2012-01-27T08:08:00.004-06:00

Am I the only one left that can honestly admit who I am? I've had people shy away from my admitting to be moody. We all have our days and times when we are not the same as yesterday or a few weeks back.

The advantage of knowing gives an approacher the heads up to proceed with caution. It's all about the approach and reception. You'll never know how I'm feeling if you've spent the majority of time contemplating asking. Or at least being considerate and respectful of the fact that, today may not be a good day. However, your reward is that it just may be; or, that your greeting has made for a better one.

Wouldn't you rather know that the person you're dealing with has some flaws? We all have them. But wouldn't it also let the person know that you have a sincere interest IN them and not confining your interaction TO them being in the best of moods always?

Don't run away and say, uh oh... this is not what I signed up for. Yea it's cool to choose not to be subjected to a bad or altered mood, but show some concern if it means anything at all to you. Challenge me to a better day or temperament.

I can go as easily from numb to nice in the same 0.3 seconds that I can go from brilliant to bitch!

A provoked mood swing is far worse than a neurological one. If for some reason my mood shifts from tame to tart during/after an encounter with you, then by all means, Of Course..... Hurry up and run! Because YOU have lit that match, however it would not be feasible to stick around until it burns out.

I have my days where you'd be better off walking thru a Lions Den in Pork Chop Pants, than to have messed with me. And then there's days where, you'd pray to a "Higher Power" to not have our shared time end. I can be your most favored life experience. It's totally up to you.

Oh and today is a good day. I just felt like pointing this out.

Now...which one of me, would you like to meet?

Get Back Up

2012-01-23T02:45:00.000-06:00

You cannot prevent every setback. However, you can make it a priority to recover quickly from them and get back on track. In every effort there will be interruptions, disappointments, even some disasters.

Your recovery time depends largely on what you decide to make of it. The time and energy you put into anger and self pity will serve mainly to prolong the time it takes to get going again. Basically that's it. Pity time is wasted time.

Accept that the setbacks will come and when they do, decide to move quickly past them. Find something positive in each regression, and that will serve as fuel to get you focused again on progressing toward your goal.

Winners and losers both stumble. The winners are the ones who quickly get back up and keep on going.

Sometimes...

2012-01-18T06:01:00.000-06:00

There are gonna be days when you flat out don't like me. And I'm sure I won't like you. Sometimes we'll wish we never met. At least once a week our smiles will be upside down because we didn't get our way. Sometimes I won't say a word to you, for fear it won't be nice. I'm gonna yell and cry and sulk, or start to pace or clean. I might even say I hate you.
But... that's not really what I mean.

While all the time I'm acting out, I'm thinking... let this not be too much. I hope it's perceived as just. Please receive my tone with an open mind, or accept that it's yours, you earned it. I'm never exempt from apologizing, and can agree to disagree. You may not feel the same but that's ok, it's fine. So anytime I strike a nerve, and you need to vent some anger, go right ahead... I can take it, especially if it's mine.

Even though we're together, it seems like we're apart. But there is truly nothing, notta, no one that can tear you from my heart.
Will you say the same to me? Not everyday, just sometimes?!

Like Wind To A Dandelion

2012-01-16T02:38:00.000-06:00

Beautiful things come and go. Most of the time you can pinpoint the arrival and departure of seasonal things. Every now and then an unexpected awe striking substance will appear, taking you by surprise. The entire time it was in your presence, you were amazed, delighted, overwhelmed yet welcoming.

You underestimate how temporary such a gem could be. You never knew you'd miss it. You never thought it's limited duration would be so short lived because it bears a lifetime of once believed to be extinct occurrences. An awakening of love, kindness, acceptance, patience and enlightenment.

If something can come in for a brief time and demonstrate an infinity of esteem, why aren't we wise enough to grasp it and make it a stationary piece of our lives. It's simply because we're afraid. We're afraid to touch it, uncertain of it's frailty thus we ignore it so not to disturb it's beauty with our insecurities.

The presence of our beautiful things like a dandelion, will wither and blow away when care, concern, acknowledgment and perseverance aren't expressed. Don't let your beautiful thing blow away, nurture your new finding and hopefully, just maybe you'll get it to stay.

Happy Birthday Daddy

2012-01-14T01:14:00.002-06:00

May you rest in eternal peace.

Love infinity,
Angela

"Ouch"! no really... Ouch

2012-01-10T08:38:00.000-06:00

I had no idea that I was allergic to fresh pineapple.
Last year I bought a fresh pineapple so I could add it to General Tso's Chicken that I'd prepared to over night ship to a dear friend of mine. After I cut and cored it, I began to just eat slice after slice and by the third one, my tongue was on fire. It felt as if I turned my back and someone sprayed it with mace. It literally stung and took my taste buds away, so I had to just eyeball the rest of the ingredients because I couldn't taste if whether or not I applied the right amount of seasonings. I also prepared a Lasagna and it too was iffy on the seasonings. They both turned out to be my worst fixings. He said he enjoyed it but...[shrug]I didn't throw it away, I just ate it sparingly the next couple of days and never checked with a doc or thought anything serious was connected.

Okay so yesterday was the first time I bought and ate one since last year and baaaaaaaaBy, same thing. First couple of slices were cool and then I got to the third that I'd cut up in a salad and wtf??? I eat canned pineapple all the time and don't get this adverse reaction. My greedy ass trys to eat more because it's delicious. I have Romaine lettuce, cherry tomatoes, mesquite chicken breast and the pineapple. You would think it was a bowl of cactus or glass shards and needles. My tongue is burning and I seriously don't want to toss it but now the entire salad is on fire. DAMN!!!

So I googled allergy symptoms and there it is... everything that's going on in my mouth and shortly thereafter, my throat and I'm scared of going into an anaphylactic shock or something so I put my kid and a close friend on call back duty to check on me later and come to think of it, I haven't heard from neither of them bitches so ummm, yea... shows how serious they took it. I kept a phone very close to me in case I needed to call for emergency transport and slept with a phone on the bed.

Come to find out, the allergy is ode to the bromelain, which is a natural enzyme found in pineapple that gets killed off during processing which is why I'm not bothered by the canned version. Other than the taste, my main reason for eating it was for the so called bromelain dietary benefits.
Daaaannng... I so wanna eat some more of it. Shooooot. Oh well, I froze it and will perhaps let someone else have it since I can't bring my greedy ass to just throw it out. Ugh, I hate that.

The Arduousness Of A Girl

2012-01-09T13:56:00.000-06:00

As she becomes a woman

When she arrives even her cry is befuddled
Selecting the proper attire with style and color to a science
Deciding to be or not a wheel in the race for peer fame
Training her hair to a distinguishing degree
Climbing the ladder because it's there and must be surpassed
Over coming obstacles that don't have to be obstacles
Picking that someone that may not coincide
Smiling before an inevitable tear preludes
Writing to express to bypass an ill tongue
Holding back her fullness to not be perceived as boastful
Demonstrating worth integrity and accountability to herself
Questioning it all in great certainty and contradiction
She rests, rems and repeats....

**Damn Bus...

2012-01-06T17:22:00.006-06:00

I have always had a crush on Busta Rhymes. Well not always... I think my first real celeb crush was Rick James and my wanting to "give it to em baby". Then Busta. Next was Laurence Fishburne, then he did some extra fancy shit or something that made me re-evaluate my lust tank. Then Terrence Howard show'd up in Best Man with his line of, "Tell me you like it" as he placed the garter on the chickamajigga's leg. I hated him in Dead Presidents mane, but yeah... that "like it" line redeemed him. Then Mr. Busta Rhymes again. Oh and then(and now- while I'm play'n) Eamonn Walker, and back to Bus. Ole sexyfinefuckaliciousass so n so. Sigh...

The only thing that scares me about him is that, he may be a bit more sexually experienced than me(if I were to ever have the pleasure) and I wouldn't be able to keep up. Now if he just wanna "do it" not quite fuck - but just "do it" I think I can take E'm. Yep - I earned this nick name "Angel Dust" at a very young age for my naturally addictive nature. I've been abstinent for a few years for sanity's sake, but I know I can still break him up. Anyway, I tend to love and listen to rap regularly. Especially when I'm in traffic. It helps me deal with the inadequacies of the other drivers with less road rage and mellows my cuss o meter per Se.
I mixed my CD's to form a perfect ride out formula and titled it "Driving Beats". It starts with Lil Boosie, "Swerve On Um" possibly not the exact title but so what, this here my juke joint!! Then I believe it's Busta's "We Want In" both self explanatory to the very early actions of driving and merging and such. But the final fuck the rest for the rest of the trip cuz dis niqqa got lyrics arriving and departing in total beast mode is um(hol on - I done made me a grilled cheese w/pepperoni and it's gettin cold. I just made this shit up so hol on)........... ............ ............
See what "Trevor" does to me? I haven't cussed this much since uhhhh, hell the car in between tracks, lol. Naw - we all grown. But I rolled more than 20 miles replaying this verse right here:{I may be off a word or two, but so-shut the fuck up & see the highlighted rules 10 lines up}

From the track "I'm a Go n Get" from Back On My BS ...
Mr Rhymes: "he had a couple dudes to support e'm, actin all extra like he had that thing on e'm and after we finished beating on e'm, and now he knew we ain't playin, that's when he walked away say'n"

Mike Epps nem or ?: "I'ma go n get my 25 - overall 27 - be back in 13 minutes wit even 20 - be back wit 27 nigga's wit them 38's" do do do do dooo

Okay... as u were. I just had to get all that out. Got me runnin round here singin n re singin this shit. And writing it down like somebody gone call for a stand in or a gangsta grandma rap off or som'n.

Bye!

I Can With A Plan

2011-12-29T18:50:00.000-06:00

Every year about this time or prior to, we make plans to do something differently and or other than that of what we'd succumbed to in the previous year. Most of us will repeat the same goal or "resolution" year after year because we don't have a sufficient plan of action vs reaction.

Perhaps this year, we can gather our goals, plan to come close, if not fully achieve them. That way, the next year will yield a smaller task if any. I say if any because, there's always room for personal growth; yet there are some that will become content with the goals sustained from the current year.

Setting smaller goals is the key to avoiding disappointment and or failure. Instead of visualizing yourself owning a fortune 500 company, tell yourself... this year, I'm gonna get a better idea of what it is I'm aiming for, in terms of what my skill level or mastered accomplishments will net me; later birthing them into a bountiful existence.

Instead of saying, I'm gonna lose over 50 pounds to look like my favorite star or glamorous/masculine idol, determine to put forth an effort to lose enough to make a noticeable/comfortable difference, within yourself. Cutting calories and keeping physically active is the one sure inexpensive way to succeed. Persistence is the hard part. Results will be seen if you start, Success will be achieved if you finish.

On quitting smoking. I once had a friend tell me that smoking is just
a habit of action. Something to do with your hands, a thought partner, a mood dis-tractor. The actual act of taking in smoke, is where you question the need/addiction. Smoke is smoke. If a house is on fire, do you approach the area to consume the remnants of it's smoke? When trash is burning, do you lean in and inhale the essence of burning garbage? Exactly... although deriving from various sources, it's all still just smoke. You can do without it. Find something productive to do with your hands. Put your thoughts on paper, and count to 10 and take deep shallow breaths to calm an ill mood. It works and is not smelly or health depriving to say the least.

Whatever New Goal you set "this year", take your time and have a plan!

In Memoriam

2011-12-12T15:34:00.002-06:00

Mr. Walter L. Davidson
1/14/1945 - 12/12/2010

Today has been one of thee best days of my life.
I am calm, serene, happy and overall alright.
I took from that - that you heard my voice this morning
and wished me well.
Continue to watch over me as I take this journey to wellness.
I love you Daddy!

Tis The Season To Be Stress Free

2011-11-23T14:46:00.000-06:00

The featured gift boxes below are simply decorative. They are indeed attractive casings, but the true gifts lye outside of them.

Happy Holidays to one and all...

Every since I can remember, my "children" were the only ones to receive material gifts from me. Every now and then someone would get a gift obtained monetarily. This was however, a rare occurrence.

I have always been up front about my beliefs and felt, as long as my home was open to anyone that was hungry, lonely or wanting to be amongst warmth and love, my place would be on their list of choice.

True giving comes from the heart, and as long as everyone is Happy, Healthy, Nourished and Together, we have the greatest gifts of all.

It wouldn't hurt to extend an offering to a Higher Power. How? You could give by sacrificing something that brings you joy, comfort and such; not smoking for a day,(longer would be great) not accessing the Internet, leaving the television off, passing up your favorite treat, volunteering to a cause of interest etc. You get the picture.

Have a heartfelt holiday season and don't forget to Pay Honor And Respect To Your Faith!

~Multitalented1

D'oh!

2011-11-15T07:50:00.001-06:00

Can you relate?! There are many instances in life that compare to having wasted your time.
Some things are comparable to being on a waiting list for years just to be told, "that list is now closed".
Or what about being in line for an item and finding out right before you're up next, that the item is sold out. Or the item was never available; got you lured in with false advertising.
Pure fuckery and deceit.
This is simply the kinda shit you never forget. You try to move on and look for an alternate "item". One that will function the same, but you're careful not to wait too long. Especially if it's not promised to you.
There will be other items, but your time is lost forever. What a waste.

There should be a law. Not a rain check but an actual law that impedes this behaviour. I'd prosecute to the fullest! Out of line... literally!

Can you reach me

2011-11-08T14:19:00.000-06:00

I'm Angie, 5'3"...
Short in size, not strengths

My dreams are huge
My goals are high
I live in the now

Striving for success consumes me
Obstacles often hinder me
Not giving up, fuels me
Tossing negativity, enlightens me

Stepping above boundaries
Claiming my Fate
Denouncing Denial
Patting my own back, Walking a solid path
Standing taller every day

Can you....

Understanding PMDD and Me...

2011-11-07T06:29:00.002-06:00

If you know me or have tuned in to my rantings, you know that I am honest and don't mind sharing any and almost everything with you. I stated earlier that I have a host of impairments that limit my social functioning. Which explain why I do some of what I do. I'm not seeking approval, I'm fine with who I am. However, I felt the need to share one of my major impairments that limit and often cause confusion in my day to day actions/activities. Take it or leave it. It's who or how I am and have been for the majority of my life!

Women with PMDD complain of irritability, anger, tension, marked depressed mood, and mood lability (crying spells for no reason, verbal outbursts, or tantrums ) to such a severity that quality of life is seriously compromised. In addition to these symptoms, some women complain of lethargy, sleep disturbance, limited concentration and a host of physical symptoms such as breast tenderness, headaches, joint and muscle pain, bloating and weight gain.

The primary symptoms that distinguish premenstrual dysphoric disorder from other mood disorders (i.e., major depression) or menstrual conditions is the onset and duration of PMDD symptoms -- with symptoms appearing during the week or so before and disappearing within a few days after the onset of menses -- and the level by which these symptoms disrupt daily living tasks. (This diminished level of functioning is generally in great contrast with the same woman's interactions and abilities at other times during the month.)PMDD is like PMS, 10 times multiplied. At least that's an escalated height for me especially if any of the symptoms are provoked or challenged.

The symptoms of PMDD may resemble other conditions or medical problems, such as a thyroid condition, depression, or an anxiety disorder. I happen to experience complications from this disorder, 2 weeks prior to the onset of menses; lasting until the site of flow. It's so identifying because, I will go from extreme negative emotion, to an uplifted silliness within minutes. Those that know me and I often joke, "uh oh, panty check". That's how well WE KNOW ME. I return to a cool fun state of being again until the cycle repeats; every month of every year of my life every since I was about 17. Well that was the first clinical diagnosis.

Those that love me for me are familiar with my changes and can accept that it's just part of me. After all, even in this time frame of impairment, I'm still my best self. I'm loved, understood and respected, and I'm good with that!

So again... Fool wit me cuz you cool wit me. Don't fuck wit me cuz you stuck wit me! An open minded compassionate individual will choose to know and hold on to me. I'm worth it! ☺

Mmmm vs Hmmm... What is that smell

2011-11-04T07:22:00.000-05:00

I love inviting scents. Whether on someones person or within an area. I've taken the time to list some recipe's that promote good scent-ual hygiene and house keeping. You'd be surprised at how many people should see and utilize these tutorial tips. It's not at all a laughing matter, I'm just saying.

I've also listed some tips on Cause and effects of the happy nose invaders

For Your Person
1. Start with a clean body. ie., Bathing, Showering, Brushing and Flossing.

2. Immediately apply scented or non scented skin moisturizer

3. Apply your favorite scent. I am one that likes to smell good even while I sleep. It helps to produce a more peaceful slumber.

For Your Home
1. Begin with a clean home ie., Having every item in its intended place. Assuming all places have been dusted and or polished.

2. Remove all trash. Using a smaller trash receptacle will insure more frequent trips to the outside bins. The larger the trash can, the more time it takes to fill, hence the longer your garbage remains inside, releasing it's ghastly odors.

3. Keep floors swept, vacuumed & mopped.

4. Dishes left over night are an extreme eye sore to humans. However, an invitation to party, to insects and rodents.

5. Dirty Laundry... is Dirty Laundry. You've already determined it was dirty, don't let your guests second the opinion. Get er done!

6. Finish up with scented oil plug-ins, candles and fresh air. Open something; a door, window... weather permitting, every now and then. If only for a few minutes.

QUICK TIPS:
If you smell it, so do we
If you drop it, pick it up
If you're done, throw it away
If you spill it, wipe it up &
If you've worn it, wash it out

The Trust Factor

2011-11-02T23:44:00.000-05:00

Do you trust "them?" In some instances it's yes. But when it comes down to personal benefit, by way of support, honesty, care and concern, it's a no for me.

I place no measured value in the opinion, direction or actions of another. More often than not, we share pertinent information with an associate, spouse, sibling or offspring, just to get it out of us, or off of our heart or mind. Once you release it, it becomes "community" knowledge which can be recycled and used against you. I am fully aware of this, so if and when I share potential critical information, I TRY to carefully consider and limit it's delivery, so to not be damaged by it's return.

Bottom line, wall or ceiling of the level of trust I place in others; it's a negative infinity! I am and remain an individualized being. Meaning even if I had a Siamese twin, and she leans toward destruction of our existence, I will personally attempt to surgically remove the entity from our union with a fork or another piercing object so to extract the cancerous mass from my person.
I am solo. I am singular. I am me.
One love...

Lyrically Speaking

2011-11-01T16:53:00.000-05:00

Eeeevery now and then, someone comes along that piques my curiosity. Someone attractive, talented and wise. Eeeevery now and then I have a talk with myself about "lane changes" and "merges." How I promised myself to remain focused on my primary interests, goals, directions. Ponderance on how easy it is to become distracted by flesh. Now music... music is a whole nuther group o pattersons. I love reading the messages of music just as much as visual art; and when it's being delivered via mode of flesh... Somebody stop me. Lawd that man can sing, his chords speak volumes while never uttering a word. Talented indeed.

I'm emotionally busy with someone else and likewise is the "flesh"(yeah we'll call em that). I'm enjoying it; the time and devotion to my "bigman", is all his. That being spilled, the reconstruction of and positioning of the road blocks of love and life, shall remain intact. Today. Today I'll bask in only the music and denounce the flesh and his wisdom. No matter how tempting the arrival.
But damn...

Status quo

2011-09-14T21:25:00.000-05:00

Reflecting

2011-09-09T06:06:00.001-05:00

People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who
shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who
brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.
~Elizabeth Gilbert

My my my name is Angela

2011-09-03T13:51:00.001-05:00

Pacing...
Wringing Hands and Stu Stu Stuttering

Jazmine Sullivan - Stuttering

No Place To Hide

2011-08-27T08:33:00.002-05:00

Humans like to think that planet Earth belongs to us. But natural disasters remind us that we're really just along for the ride. In every place humans live, the possibility of a natural disaster exists. There are wildfires in hot, dry regions and avalanches in cold, moist ones. On land, earthquakes rattle buildings and topple trees; underwater, they can trigger monster waves capable of erasing entire coastlines. Volcanoes burble up from Earth's molten core, and hurricanes, tornadoes, and lightning come from the sky.

Being a victim of natural disaster(s), I've seen first hand how people run, race and curse against the inevitable. Placing blame on landlords, manufacturers, cultural diversity and yes, even GOD.
Get informed and get prepared by having a plan. Know the warning signs. Know the shelter route. Pack and place to the side, a necessary staples kit(non perishable food, clothing and first aid items, emergency contact information for yourself and relief agents).

That is the least yet most you can do in the event of a natural disaster. Trust that a higher power will guide you through the rest of your recovery.

Summer Madness - Kool & The Gang

2011-08-24T14:46:00.001-05:00

Basking in greatness...

Cause and Effect

2011-08-21T07:53:00.000-05:00

One of the weirdest things that I've noticed about myself over the last several years, is that I eat to reward myself for making positive decisions.

I've found myself racing off to the kitchen right after telling a potential visitor not to come by. As soon as they've accepted that I'm not feeling the company, I go straight to the kitchen and have something that I'd been craving and putting off all week.

What is that? Experts suggest that over eating and other bad habits are triggered by childhood trauma or an experience that has yet to be faced and or let go of. Hmmm, I just don't see the connection to the reward. I am socially withdrawn from a lot of friends and family, and they are aware of this so why should my telling them not to visit, cause an eating effect? Is it that I feel bad that I had to tell them no, or that I feel better after trying so hard to not hurt their feelings?

I have gotten extremely angry because someone called and said, "Hey, what are you doing?" "I'm in your neighborhood." You would think they said, "Hey bitch, I'll be right over there to kill your fish and track your house with mud." LMAO... I get all short of breath and fly off the handle because I just don't like unexpected visitors. I'm never dressed for one, and it's an inconvenience to have to grab a "suit and tie" just to answer the door and stare at each other. Because usually I'm so irate that they've arrived, I barely say six words.

However, if I'm able to avoid the visit, it's so invigorating and the ice cream and cookies get a much wanted punishing. I'm still trying to figure this out. I just hope I do so before I'm on the news being extracted from my room because I've eaten myself into a silly, sedentary state of satisfaction.

Dear Love

2011-08-16T21:26:00.002-05:00

The things we say and do in love can also mimic hate
When someone or thing can provoke intense emotion from a mere shift from left to right, carefully is the mark.
For all the deep breaths and shutters we yield simply ode to love, there are no mistakes when our heart skips a beat it's the welding and the process of a union.

We want so much to share us, to feel the same bare touch
the pain that spills when the vessels tear is nothing to yearn for twice. I want for everything I soil to be wiped clean as if an illusion. If for one second I miss my mark...
Please pardon the intrusion. All I need is your canvas to carve the image of better days. Our ways will take some getting used to yet there's nothing about us to change. Just expect accept and respect it. Dear Love... I need you!

Respectfully Yours,

With All Of Mine

**Not Again

2011-08-15T13:55:00.000-05:00

You ever seen something that makes you so irate it literally takes your breath away? Even though you'd seen it before, seeing it again refreshes the anger as if it were the first time. Especially when the person that places the "item" damn near knows for a fact that it would be viewed and possibly received negatively.
Perhaps they have no regard for the outcome or perhaps it's the reaction they are seeking. Well it worked. Works every time. Nothing to do but sit the fuck back and quit looking at, to, and for it.
Silly of me...

Mental Cleansing

2011-08-11T07:46:00.000-05:00

I've had so much going on and it all amounted up to around umm

let's say nothing. Well some of it was of good measure, but for

the most part I've been clouded.

I don't regret any of it, as it all was necessary for growth.
One would think to go the other way

when familiar obstacles begin to surface. I guess the more
attractive ones are harder to ignore. The ones that are
valuable, yet not yours to covet. Whether seasonable or
reasonable the stones that weighed me down will be moved and
the ones that are mine will be used to surmount me.
Yeah I know, I often talk in riddles; an enigma to most, but hey...
Take ya time, you'll catch on. The complexity in my way of
speaking is an acquired taste not easily swallowed or very well
consumed. My knowing what's being expressed is an accomplished
feat. I only spill these things here to get them out of me.
It suffices for me.

If my choices leave me in a state of what some would call loneliness or despaired, while I call it serene, then again, I've accomplished a sought after conclusion. There is only one person that can do me and we all know it's simply me! Sure someone or things out there can complete me, but for now... I'll call it, Me.

I'm empty now, rambled out, once again making room for enhancements

Or a place to store the emptiness... who knows what my decisions have netted. Oh well, waiting.

Le'Oven

2011-08-08T13:55:00.000-05:00

It is extremely hot all over!
That's all I got. [wiping brow - sipping H2O]
Returning you to your regularly scheduled event.
Central Air, back to you!

When I Was 4

2011-08-05T17:10:00.000-05:00

When I was just 4 years old, I had my very first professional art kit and I remember it just like yesterday. I loved it!
As early as 4, I recall my father having a separate family that offered my sister and I a new place to run and laugh and learn. With more sisters and even another mother.(whodathunkit?)
I was still growing into my personality at 4, but everyone knew I'd be someone special.
All little 4 year old girls want bright pretty things to play with. 4 year olds are smart enough to know what they want and don't want or like and dislike. We have a favorite food. A favorite song. Our favorite television show. That perfect outfit to match the favorite shoe. When we're just 4, we have no idea how far and wide our range of life will soar. We just know that each year there's another candle. We don't know what to anticipate as an adult. All we know is that they're much bigger than us. One of the best things that happened when I was 4, is that my prince was born.

Born 4 years 22 days after me. I didn't know at 4, but somewhere between then and now, I knew what my preference of my ideal guys' physical appearance should be. In August of 2008 he found me, more than 500 miles away. Since then, we've kept in touch. Exchanged gifts, expressed intimacy, fell apart, pulled together, changed and remained the same. During that time, I learned what my ideal guys' character should be. Of all the things that happened when I was 4, the one that took me over 40 years to find, is my most cherished. The years without you were my growing years. The 3 years that I've known of you have aided in my learning and sharing years. May the next 4+ years continue to bring the same if not greater comfort and completeness as the first.
(smile) Happy Anniversary Vayda, I Love You!

IKR?!

2011-08-03T13:55:00.001-05:00

Catch 22

Nobody knows what I go through
Indecisions made me passive
They say I want my cake and I want to eat it too
Less satisfied if I don't, consequences when I do
These lessons, they lead me on my way
But when company is tempting me, I'm turned around
But I might wanna go that way,
Don't wanna go that way
Well, it's a Catch 22
Damned if I don't, Damned if I do
Yes, it's a catch 22
Damned if I don't, Damned if I do
Damned if I do

How many times does it take to learn just one thing,
'cause I keep ending up here
And I'm not a scientist so I just keep on praying that I won't
Keep getting the same results each day
I said that I can't be with you
But when you turn away I pull back your hands to stay
your hands to stay
So many days turn to years
That brought us here
And we shied through time without too many tears
But we still made decisions creating divisions
So many contradictions
Why didn't we listen?

Well, it's a catch 22 catch 22
Damned if I don't, Damned if I do
Yes, it's a catch 22
Damned if I don't, Damned if I do

Cause when I see you looking at her
I can't stand it, my eyes can't conceive
You gave her the smile you gave to me
I love you selfishly
I can feel so strongly
Oh, how you throw me
But still you know me
Oh, you know me

Yes, it's a catch 22,
Damned if I don't, Damned if I do
damned if I do
Yes, it's a catch 22, catch 22
Damned if I don't, Damned if I do
I'm damned if I don't, I'm damned if I do

By Goapele

SLOW DOWN

2011-08-01T08:53:00.001-05:00

Take your time...

When we rush... We're usually gonna miss something!

Wake up late... everyone pays for your rushed commute!

Put your foot in your mouth... only you can get it out!

Shouldn't have worn that... making a bad impression!

Having a plan... is not a spontaneous event!

Being your best... does not mean being first!

Utilize the 5 P's... Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance

Today's Prohibitions

2011-07-26T11:48:00.001-05:00

I want to make a batch of peanut butter oatmeal cookies but I can't. I have a slight disparity with portion sizes and will just over do it.

I want to go buy this really cute pair of black shorts that I saw this morning but I won't. I've gotten a tad bit up in years and they are a tad too short for my age group.

I want so bad to eject this movie, "Breach" but I can't. I'd like to give my fair opinion of it, but just can't stay focused long enough to grasp the plot. I've rewound 5 x's already, ugh.

I want to order a pizza right now, But... I wouldn't dare. I can make a much tastier one for less money spent. But, I won't do that either.

I want to include many more of todays limitations but I won't. This is really rather juvenile and a plea for someone to say, "Go ahead and do it all". Of course I won't continue or react adversely to the list. Better go give "Breach" another try.
*hitting play* Again

Good Morning

2011-07-24T08:12:00.000-05:00

This song is the perfect depiction of my being a "morning person".
Gerald Levert expresses it best, down to the ~~favorite~~ position.
No better way to start the day... Good Morning!

You Early This Morning

2011-07-24T08:09:00.000-05:00

The miles prevent me from touching your face and oh how I'd love to smell you. I was awakened by you at the peak of dawn, but just the same, I embrace you.

As I told you before, there's nothing outside, that can keep me from wanting to have you. Even bareness or absence of limbs and teeth, wont stop me from yearning to love you.

When our day comes, don't act surprised by my actions or how I greet you. I'll be off guard or shy at first, by my privilege to finally meet you.

If there's any doubt that I've been groomed for you, in the years before I found you; Just retrace your steps with all that went wrong with the others that could have bound you.

You were placed here for we, yep you and just me; to finally express our talents. To learn and share from each others past, our union of a perfect balance.

You complete me as I compliment you, all while sharing this morning.

What's The Difference

2011-07-23T20:02:00.000-05:00

When I think chance, I think of possibility
When I think risk, I think of ambivalence and danger
While taking a chance, I'm increasing my opportunity
While taking a risk, I'm decreasing my probability
If I take a chance, I set myself up to succeed
If I take a risk, the outcome could be bleak
So given the chance, I can do all things through Christ
Choosing a risk, is not worth my life

Yay!!!

2011-07-21T12:41:00.003-05:00

Congrats baby on your strength, dedication and consistency.

You are my hero every day of each week, within every month of every year. I love you Vayda!

Happy 12th Birthday Dajana

2011-07-13T07:50:00.001-05:00

Nana loves and misses you! Can't wait till you come home from your summer vacation.
I hope today and everyday is just as you wish it to be. Tight Hugs n Soft Kisses!

Label me a Cougar

2011-07-12T02:19:00.001-05:00

Significant age disparity in sexual relationships has been and remains a feature of couples in many cultures and societies. The most common pattern in heterosexual couples is an older man with a younger woman. This may be brought about as an arranged marriage, or either member may pursue and initiate the relationship. Relationships involving a younger male and an older female also exist, and while not as common, have become considerably more common in recent years.

The term alphamegamia can be used when a person is sexually aroused by partners of a different age group, and "chronophilia" can describe a sexual fixation on members of a different age group.

Cougar refers to an older woman, usually in her 40's who sexually pursues younger men in their 20's or early 30's. Term used by TV comedies 30 Rock and How I Met Your Mother (episode "Aldrin Justice"), the movie Ocean's Thirteen, and the NBC reality TV show Age of Love. The 2007 film Cougar Club was dedicated to the subject - its plot was about two males creating a club where parties are thrown where male members get the chance to meet and have sexual encounters with "cougars".

Hmmmm, I haven't purrrrr-sued any one. However, I didn't growl scratch or pounce in defense toward advances initiated by "junior achievers" either. Well sweep out my cage and wipe me down, Cause I'm On...

Kelly KEEPS telling my bizness...

2011-07-08T20:17:00.003-05:00

           I effin miss him and he knows who he is
                Yea U Mr. Man
                        [damn]

I'm having so much trouble staying in my lane. I want to pull over,

I want to bust a U turn, I want I want I...

sigh - fuckit - Hi, my name is....

Kelly Price - Himaholic

There's So Much Going On

2011-07-05T21:47:00.001-05:00

When you have a slew of ideas, goals, challenges, demands and responsibilities swimming in your head, you've got to find a relief station. In regards to the head, talking about it or writing it down helps to diminish the load. Yea sure, it's still your stuff to bear, but you can carry it through other *channels.
*Talk
*Pace
   *Gather
    *Scribble
     *Erase...
    *Dictate
   *Edit
*Proof
*Print
Now doesn't that feel better?

5 Year Fetch

2011-06-22T09:43:00.000-05:00

There is always someone that asks, "where do you see yourself in 5 or more years?" Interesting enough, when you're a multitasker you ponder where or what you'll do in the next 5 minutes. You set out to have the best family, job, the best car, home, body and it back strokes to the best shoes, sandwiches, hair style and the best deepest undisturbed sleep. What you once dreamed of is no more or seemingly out of reach. All you set out to do, never got done. Losing track of your goals doesn't mean they aren't attainable; it only means other options and or ideas have taken precedence for now. Recapturing what you anticipated may or may not be pragmatic, having an alternate goal is foreseeable. No matter what you set out to do or acquire, is still up to you to pursue. There is no time line, or deadline that depicts you as a failure as long as there is breath in your being. It's never too late, but I most likely won't pursue that fantastic job or fastest car when I'm in my mid 80's, but I still can have the sweetest nursing home attendant, better health, the best family, comfortable shoes, very appealing wigs, denture friendly foods and my most accomplished... a mild case of narcolepsy. So to sum it all up, in five years, I will probably be re-posting this because I'm still not in possession of my goals or have achieved them, yet am convincing someone else that they too can evoke greatness or start again.

Father's Are Wonderful People

2011-06-19T00:01:00.000-05:00

Happy Father's Day to all the father's of the world.
I agree with the author of this poem and felt it best fit today's message!

Fathers are wonderful people
Too little understood,
And we do not sing their praises
As often as we should...

For, somehow, Father seems to be
The man who pays the bills,
While Mother binds up little hurts
And nurses all our ills...

And Father struggles daily
To live up to "HIS IMAGE"
As protector and provider
And "hero or the scrimmage"...

And perhaps that is the reason
We sometimes get the notion,
That Fathers are not subject
To the thing we call emotion,

But if you look inside Dad's heart,
Where no one else can see
You'll find he's sentimental
And as "soft" as he can be...

But he's so busy every day
In the grueling race of life,
He leaves the sentimental stuff
To his partner and his wife...

But Fathers are just WONDERFUL
In a million different ways,
And they merit loving compliments
And accolade of praise,

For the only reason Dad aspires
To fortune and success
Is to make the family proud of him
And to bring them happiness...

And like OUR HEAVENLY FATHER,
He's a guardian and a guide,
Someone that we can count on
To be ALWAYS ON OUR SIDE.
~Helen Steiner Rice

Humorous Joke

2011-06-03T19:55:00.000-05:00

A teacher was doing a study testing the senses of first graders,

using a bowl of Lifesavers.

The children began to say:

"Red............cherry,"
"Yellow.......lemon,"
"Green.........lime,"
"Orange.......orange,"

Finally the teacher gave them all honey Lifesavers.

After eating them none of the children could identify the taste.

"Well," he said, "I'll give you all a clue; It's what your mother may
sometimes call your father."

One little girl looked up in horror, spit her Lifesaver out and yelled:
"Oh, my God! They're assholes!!!

"UNCLE"

2011-05-29T07:40:00.001-05:00

When is it fair to throw in the towel in love and war?

The biggest part of the challenge is the wait. The timing it takes to be sure if he/she is the one. It can be an extremely overwhelming experience. Although fun and rewarding at times, you almost can compare it to having placed money in a vending machine, selecting an item and have it get lodged to the point it's never coming out. You beat, pause, shake, curse, tilt and press until you've exhausted every measure of having and savoring it. Yeah... you still want it, but at some point you have to give up and walk away. It's not considered quitting when it's clear you'd never prevail.

Your investment in love is not that much different. You've left marks and signs that you were there. A word, a scent, a token, a gesture an image. Some things will be lost but never ever forgotten. You may be preoccupied for a minute, but if even for a second, a memory of what once was will come into play.

Appreciate it, because at that very second, it paid off. Cherish these little things. Collectively, all of the seconds will add up to time well spent.

Mine to keep or...

2011-05-23T08:42:00.000-05:00

"Yours To Take"

Metaphorically Speaking

2011-05-22T11:21:00.000-05:00

If one more person tells me, "I shouldn't have said that". I only say things that are relevant or presumably so. Perhaps some things are better left unsaid, but if I have a qualm about an immediate issue that needs addressing, consider yourself, licked and stamped, because I will deliver it.
Especially if it has relevance or significance to me. Or is misleading to my establishment of friendship or partnership with you.

I don't claim to be perfect or the slight bit flawless, none of us are. If there is a problem or distortion with me, I can take hearing it. I will love or attend to the person no less for calling me on a prevarication of mine. So why must it always happen to me? I'm always critiqued for speaking up. People have stopped speaking to me, simply because I re-wrapped and dropped off back to them, their shit, that was originally intended for me to form an opinion of.

My intent is to bring the issue to the stand, confined to myself and the offender or the "actor" per se. In that I'm saying, just because I talk a lot, and am known to share a lot of my goings' on, I do know when to fold and keep my mouth shut. I won't let others determine our destiny by including them in our personal confusion.

To let someone continually make an ass of them self by way of me, makes me an ass for consuming the seemingly non truth and just playing along, to not hurt their feelings. My feelings are also hurt for you to think I am naive enough to fall for what ever you present to me.
Wouldn't we both be nurtured more so if we acknowledge the cake as cake and not a wedge of cheese?

I've often lost time and sleep pondering what if anything I should have said or done differently. I've seriously exhausted, exhausting myself. Once I give it back, it's no longer my problem. Fix that up, and apologize to me for a change. Admit your slip and trust me that it doesn't have to happen again. Try me, you can tell me anything and if I'm feeling you, interested in you, somehow connected to you... we can overcome any future discrepancies by telling the truth. I can take it. So give it to me straight, no chaser...

Picture This

2011-05-21T07:36:00.000-05:00

When was the last time you just laughed until you thought your jaw would lock. I have a few friends, but mostly family members that can get me laughing to no end.

A few of my favorite laugh out loud movies are, ok ok... what about in Black Sheep when Chris Farley is being drug by his tie, caught in a locked trunk with sparks flying from his belly. What about that kid and Spry ass Granny always offering to make sandwiches in Bad and Badder Santa?

Or on Bandits when Billy Bob Thornton wakes up and yells, "Beavers and Ducks" what was that all about?! Yes, and on Elf, when Will Ferrell is experiencing an escalator ride for the first time, with his legs gapped at 6:00?! ROFLMAO...

Happy Gilmore's(Adam Sandler)Grand mother being told she could get a warm glass of shut the hell up by the "orderly" when requesting milk. Ben Stiller in anything cracks me up and even though this ended b/sadly, I loved hearing Samuel Jackson and John Travolta exchange hilarious lines in Pulp Fiction, Royale with Cheese.

Laughing is such a healthy effective cure for darn near anything. When my kids were sick growing up, as long as they didn't have anything contagious, I'd let one of their closest friends visit and they'd play and laugh until the ailment was history.

So when something has you in a rut, arm yourself with a good movie or a funny friend and you'll forget allll about it.

WHICH WAY IS UP

2011-05-21T07:29:00.000-05:00

Are you or do you know someone that suffers from Bipolar Disorder? There are numerous medical terms that sum up the many mental impairments that exist, but when one suffers from more than a few at a time, it can often be determined as Bipolar.
Depression, Social Anxieties, Panic Attacks, PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Dysfunction) ummm this is like, PMS 5x's or more multiplied, OCD, Personality Disorders I could go on but I'd like to stop there, I'm getting dizzy.

Usually, once a diagnosis has been made, the first thing the doctors do, is try to match you with one of many anti anxiety or anti depressant drugs. I refuse to take something that alters or basically masks the problem. You know... one minute you feel as if you're going over the edge, you take your prescribed dosage, and you're all better. Wait wait uh oh... you're not ALL better, you've just been subdued until the next scheduled dosage of the masking agent.

Most people are and have been successfully treated or suppressed from medicines and psychological counseling. But what works for me, is to get in touch and familiar with my impairments, and avoid people, places and or situations that provoke them.

Excuse me, what's that? Yes of course; as I've stated in my brief bio, everything I speak of, has some relevance or significance to myself. I suffer from at least four of the above listed impairments and a couple of others that aren't listed. I am not ashamed of it. Telling others only helps them to further understand my actions and lacks there of.

Depression and Bipolar Disorder is not just a woman's disease. Children and even men suffer from the exact same impairments and more and more of them are speaking up. It's not an ailment of fault or abuse, and is often bought on by a neurological or chemical imbalance. There are however, individuals that attempt to self medicate with drugs and alcohol, which lead to a more elevated state of the problem.

Would you believe that some of the most brilliant minds and even some psychotherapists themselves, have at some point in their lives, been challenged by a mental or psychological impairment.

The best thing you can do for a friend or family member that may be suffering from any such listed impairment, is to listen, accept and respect who and how they are. Ridicule is only buying your rejection from them. Taunting will get you all kinds of physically or verbally bent or beat up.(lol, violence is often not a result, however... don't go there if you don't have a way back)! Seriously, we have enough to deal with, within our selves.

If you have it in you, and know someone that is trapped in the ups and downs of any mental or physical challenge, let them know that you understand and will have the patience to familiarize yourself with their needs. Enough so to make them feel comforted by your acceptance!

Greetings ~N~ Gratitudes [repost]

2011-05-18T08:40:00.002-05:00

Hello...

Was that too bad?! I have my anti social days; however, speaking to a passer by won't cost you a thing(in most cases, lol). It just sticks my buttons when I've spoken to someone and they ignore me as if I've offered verbal anthrax. I'm learning to not let it bring me down and it darn sure doesn't provoke me to never speak again.
[I just had to repost this because it's not just confined to person to person greetings. Via email, text, or snail mail also apply. Geesh, get over yourself and acknowledge that you've been acknowledged]

I've placed into consideration, that perhaps I didn't speak loud enough or the recipient may be audibly challenged. Which ever the case may be, it should be part of your human nature to extend some sort of greeting(verbal, a smile or wave) when approaching anyone.

Good bye...

*******************************************************

Thank you...

Did I owe you that?! Was I assigned to be your door opener?! Did my kind verbal gesture just happen to fall into your "due to you" category, where no extension of gratitude should apply?!

Why is everyone so angry and not being able to confine it to the source. Or do what I do, stay inside if I'm having a less than friendly day. Seriously, I do. I experience days that I get up, and roll my eyes at the reflection in the mirror, lol...But on those days, if I don't have to interact with the public, I just don't. I know most of us have heard the saying, "if you don't have something nice to say, don't say nothing at all". Yea... No... This is different. What could the response alternately be to someone that has just held a door open for you, "Shut that *&#! door right now, you @%*&"? Maybe geeeez...

Well, point is... There is no outstanding balance due, for being polite and respectful of one another. If you feel as I do about all of the above

You're welcome...

Literacy For Life

2011-05-16T06:51:00.000-05:00

Everyone knows someone that is challenged by literacy. It's not pleasant for that person. Have you ever wondered what it's like to go some where with a group of people, and not be able to read a menu? How about being asked to read something, and declining; blaming that, "you don't have your glasses". I've heard them all.

It's no laughing matter. It embarrasses them, and sometimes can lead to depression, social anxieties and maybe even suicide. Reading is an important tool of communication. Communication is an important tool of life. There are other forms of communication and definitely more important tools of life. Being able to read and write, helps one to become more independent. It allows you to present your self. To defend yourself. To express and extend...

There are all types of literacy challenges. Visual, Cultural, Traditional Alphabetic. The list goes on.I'm not saying that it's up to you to personally teach or help that person. However, pointing them in the right direction of someone, place or thing that can, is the most selfless thing you could do for them. Buying books just the way some or most of us were introduced, you remember... Dr. Seuss, Curious George, Berenstain Bears, all of those "my first book" series. Using everyday food and clothing items to identify alphabetical or visual challenges. Starting there is a beginning at any age.

You're never too young or old to learn...

Education has no expiration date.

Your Goodbye...

2011-05-13T13:38:00.000-05:00

Diana Ross's version of "All Of Me"
(scene from Lady Sings The Blues)

If I Were A Twin

2011-05-11T08:28:00.001-05:00

The other me in you would be tall
You're fearless and flawless
You'd be feisty and fierce
Very outspoken and articulate
A connoisseur of words of self
Literal Lustful Lyrical
Consistent Combative Complex
Picky Pouty Problematic
Beautiful Balanced Buoyant
Independent Impatient Imaginable
Suspenseful Suspect Sensitive
Arrogant Artistic Ambivalent
The you inside of me is just like that but shorter

Bigger Balder Badder

2011-05-09T16:06:00.002-05:00

Okay y'all, if we've conversed, you know how I feel about unveiling my new shorter natural doo. I shaved it completely except for a brow length bang back in July of 2010. As it grew back I didn't know what to do with it, sick of braids and perm. Well I guess if I'm gonna start somewhere, I will make it here. I am so self conscious about my size and my hair so it's really taking a lot of adjusting to. The weight goes up and down so I'm better with that but the hair length is too new. I'm used to having length perhaps I thought it was taking concentration away from my mid section.

I started these two strand twists myself on 4/3/11 using the Jamaican Mango Lime Locking Creme wax because that's what some cute lil girl in the line at Walmart used to start hers. I know wax isn't a good choice as it creates a barrier where moisture gets limited penetration. I guess(shrug). I don't want them to lock at all in case I change my mind.

I later did the same twists with 100% African Shea Butter and got pretty much the same results as far as hold is concerned. My biggest challenge is to leave em the fluck alone. At first I untwisted, washed and re twisted every weekend. I've now gotten up to two weeks and these pics are actually done using nothing. I took them aloose to moisten and starting playing in it and admiring the curly look and thickness. I've never done twists or locs of any formation, but I'm learning and expect to getter better quick. A couple of my braid clients are inquiring, so woo hoo $$!

I decided to retwist immediately without washing and without an aid ie,. creme, gel, wax or anything. It's holding perfectly so I'm learning, it's growing so fast and well... that's it. This is whats under the wigs and cute lil hats.

Happy...

2011-05-08T00:02:00.001-05:00

To all whom the greeting applies!

NOT MY BIOLOGICAL BABY

2011-05-05T07:02:00.001-05:00

I CALL HER MY BABY BECAUSE,

1.) I HAVE TO FEED HER(GAS AND FLUIDS)
2.) I HAVE TO BATHE HER(NICE HAND WASH AND WET HER FEET)
3.) SHE LET'S ME KNOW WHEN SHE'S ILL(WARNING/INDICATOR LIGHTS)
4.) I ADMINISTER HER REGULARLY SCHEDULED SHOTS(OIL CHANGE, INSPECTIONS ETC. AND WHEN SHE'S A LIL OLDER; SHE'LL GET TUNED UP!)
5.) I MAKE SURE SHE HAS NEW SHOES WHEN NEEDED(TIRES)
6.) SHE HAS A VALID BIRTH CERTIFICATE AND STATE ID(VIN #, LICENSE PLATE AND STICKER)
7.) SHE HAS LIFE INSURANCE(FULL COVERAGE WITH A LOW DEDUCTIBLE)
8.) AND FINALLY, IF YOU TOUCH HER WITH INTENT TO DO BODILY HARM; I WILL GO PARENTAL POSTAL ON YA!

I TAKE EXCELLENT CARE OF MY BABY, AND SHE SHOWS HER APPRECIATION BY STARTING UP; RAIN, SLEET OR SNOW. WE DON'T NEGLECT OUR BIOLOGICAL CHILDREN, SO LET'S NOT DISREGARD OUR MATERIAL "BABIES"

Channeled Cravings

2011-05-05T07:00:00.000-05:00

For the near perfect relationship, I crave:
Intellect
Intelligence
Participation
Honesty
Communication
Self Sufficiency
Respectfulness
Goal Orientation
God Fearing
Integrity
Consistency
Hygienic
Independence
Solid Affirmation
Impartiality
Assertiveness
Balance
Competence
Humorousness

I have no interest what so ever in the complete opposite of my cravings. Why should one be consumed by what he/she has not a taste or desire for?
It is my choice to devour only what nourishes and sustains for the betterment and overall growth to/for my person.
Why shouldn't I
Why shouldn't U

I have accepted that in relationships, there is no perfection. However, there are approximates. I can almost taste success, mmmm!

Today I almost...

2011-05-03T11:03:00.000-05:00

Became one of the people who skip, bypass, ignore or forget to vote in the primary elections. I knew it was held today, I know the importance of every vote in every election. BUT... today I just don't feel well.
We have a new polling location this year, didn't feel like searching for it, but I did. It only takes a few minutes to stand, select and submit.
They do what they can for me. I don't want to become only a general election voter. I've rarely missed having my vote count every year since 19. I've even sat in for more than 12 hours assisting other voters. Now at the age of 47, I'm still voting as I did today.

Did or will you?

Things I should have placed in the Fire

2011-05-03T08:49:00.000-05:00

My temper

Poor Judgement

Insecurities

Past Ill Experiences

This one shirt I bought

My bad habits

One sided assumptions

My stubbornness

Unrehearsed words

That huge batch of cookies(giggle)

Ill written notes

Preconceived beliefs

Thinking I could do everything alone

Some of what I said yesterday

Some of what I'll say today

New Ill Experiences

Bad decisions

This Pen

But no no no, not that...

The ability to apologize
Yea, I'll keep that

I'm sorry!

Married to the Keystroke

2011-05-03T08:47:00.000-05:00

Is it you that I admire or the pen you push

When you jot it all down, I can hear you

The way you woo me with your high definitions

The way you comfort me when I'm feeling slighted

Am I naive to think it's you that spell bounds me

That everything you express from yours is mine

You share your soul with me like we have a destiny

But ctrl alt shift and delete stand between us

I anticipate your word play

I thrive to take it all in

Others take you for granted they don't file you as I do

Damn I feel so giddy

So reinvigorated

We flow naturally together no hindrance or fault

How come we can't just meet here periodically

To smile over each others hands

To bend our fingers in perfect alignment

What really stands between us

Not like a space bar or shifts

Something more permanent like "Cap locks" and "Back spaces"

Please say you get it

My home keys are sticking

F1 can't help me

I don't intend to esc this

The feeling is invigorating

I'm hoping you get a similar placement in your heart

When you find me with-in your focus

Do I want to enter into a duration with you

Yes

I Do

Send

"Privacy Fence"

2011-04-28T07:25:00.000-05:00

Yes it's slotted, so hows it private? It's a tease

It's tall too, but so is the treasure it protects

Very preventive, if I want it to be

See you'd have to go around if you don't have the key

I'd have to literally open it for you

Sorta LET you in

Unless

You know the password

You have what it takes to bypass the code

You can't use trickery

You can't break or tear it down

Yes, you can use skill

No you can't have a clue

If you can hop THAT fence

You can hop THIS fence...

YES

2011-04-25T09:18:00.000-05:00

OK
AGREE
SURE
CERTAINLY
UH HUH
COMPLETELY
BASICALLY
APPROVED
CHECK
EXACTLY
OF COURSE
SATISFACTORY
YEA
DEFINITELY
ALRIGHT
FINE
ABSOLUTELY
POSITIVELY
ACCEPTED
UNDOUBTEDLY
SIMPLY
AFFIRMATIVE
SUITABLE
YEP

Embrace Easter

2011-04-24T04:48:00.000-05:00

He paid a debt He didn't owe,
Because I owed a debt I couldn't pay!

* Some scenes may be overly graphic and
or objectionable to some viewers.

View at your own discretion here,
or by accessing the video @ the foot of the page!

My Private Part Died Today - humorous repost

2011-04-22T07:41:00.000-05:00

An old man, Mr. Goldstein, was living the last days of his life in a nursing home. One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed. Nurse Tracy asked if there was anything wrong.

"Yes, Nurse Tracy," said Mr. Goldstein, "my private part died today, and I am very sad."

Knowing her patients were forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, "Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Goldstein, please accept my condolences."

The following day, Mr. Goldstein was walking down the hall with his private part hanging out of his pajamas, when he met Nurse Tracy. "Mr. Goldstein," she said, "you shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your private part back inside your pajamas."

"But, Nurse Tracy," replied Mr. Goldstein, "I told you yesterday that my private part died."

"Yes, you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?" asked Nurse Tracy. "Well," he replied. "Today's the viewing."

Delicate Ambiguities

2011-04-18T14:26:00.000-05:00

THEREISOFTENSOMEONEORTHINGTHATCOMESINTOOURLIFEWHENWE
LEASTEXPECTITANDKNOCKSUSOFFOURFEETINAGOODWAY.
IACTUALLYDONTMINDBEINGCAUGHTOFFGUARDBYSOMETHINGTHAT
BENEFITSMYHAPPINESSANDWELLBEINGFUELINGMYPERSONWITHDESIRES. ICANHANDLETHEUNINVITEDBUTWELCOMEOCCURANCESBECAUSEIT
FEELSGOODTOHAVEAMAJORPIECEOFSOMETHINGYOUDIDNOTASKFOR. IFEVERYTHINGINOURLIFEWASPLANNEDITWOULDBEBORINGANDFAINT.
IMGLADIWASSITTINGINTHATVERYSPOTWHENTHEBALLFELLINMYCOURT.

Do you see what eye see

2011-04-16T11:17:00.000-05:00

Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. The same holds true for the consumer when they know what they're looking at.

If you've ever visited an art museum, you may have questioned the birth of a "piece", puzzled by it's focus. What was the artist thinking. What was on their mind as they whittled or sketched away so eagerly. Once you're able to dissect art, you've seen magic. It unfolds within you as if you're witnessing it's direction, and it visually comes to life.

You can't just look at it, you have to look in it. It may not make sense to you at first, but if you really want to feel what the artist felt, you'll find it. Or maybe not. And that's OK too. All art is beautiful and meaningful to me, I have the gift of reading it. When seeing a formation of colors, directions, dimensions and elevations, it's literally breath taking to me.

I'm thoroughly interested in reading, even if there aren't any words. Art is to be read, it's our visual braille per Se, I get it.

What Did You Do Last Night - Dizzy Lady

2011-04-16T11:04:00.000-05:00

I like how you looked, when I looked at you, while you were
looking at me last night

I love how you smiled when I smiled at you, while you were smiling
at me last night

Yea Yea Yea...

I dig what you said when I talked to you, while you were talking
to me, last night

I thought that you were thinking of me, while I was thinking of
you last night

I dreamed that you were dreaming of me...

blah blah blah...

I hope you didn't see me, when I seen you last night

I hope that chick I saw you with, won't be with you all night

You're leaving here this evening, please don't be gone all night

I'll wake you in the morning, or maybe late tonight

If you're mad that I'm mad at you, for what you did last night

Just think of how I feel here without you every night

Don't start...

I like that you were crying when I cried for you last night

I hate that you were leaving, when you left here last night

You promised you wouldn't fight me, when we fought last night

I knew that you were lying when you lied to me last night

(((Slam)))

Will you be back tonight

Or in the morning

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2011-04-15T03:15:00.002-05:00

Hi, the self protectant part of me could only make it this far. The loving compassionate part of me is the reason I'm up placing it here at 4:15 am, in hopes it meets your eyes someday.

To recognize that you haVe been one of the most necessary, beneficial to growth people I have ever met. There were times when at my lowest point, you were there to comfort and assure me.

My first/last auto wreck, you were second to 911 becAuse as I said you have a calming effect. My dad was ailing til passing and I chose you to hear the ugly crY, because I knew you didn't care how I sounded as I released. You consistently embraced my sadness and sootheD it with your kind words and understandings.

On the days when I got in my own way, fumbled around and just couldn't get right, there you were to correct my steps. For everyday of our season, and for every reason why God placed us, you need to know I genuinely Appreciate and thank you for fulfilling your role.

The biggest part of me will always love you!

The Art Of Schooling

2011-04-12T08:16:00.001-05:00

Perfect teaching

Is nothing other than Sharing with
others
the knowledge that we claim as our
own.
My heart is teaching me
How to be pure.

My soul is teaching
me
How to be happy.

I am
teaching you
That no one is Perfect.

That we all can be taught

To be and do
better!

The Ultimate Transfer

2011-04-09T18:35:00.003-05:00

There's gotta be another way there.

For about 6 years now, I've been trying to get to a higher, happier, healthier destination. Yet I've relied on the same mode of transportation. A similar vehicle per Se to replace another and although I gain some knowledge of where I'm headed, I consistently arrive at the same hazardous familiar avenue.
It's like I've been waiting on a train in a station that's long since been condemned. The train is never coming, I'm taking the wrong approach. Sitting here year after year hoping just one day the road will open and I can finally board.

As I gather my "things" to move on, I'm not bitter. I grasp mental notes and occurrences of passer by's and things I've seen, shared and allowed to exist while I sat. A waste of time yes to some degree, but the quality of the time spent was frequently warm and welcoming. Disguising itself as valuable.

Almost as if I were destined to sit there to wait, learn and find "stuff" to grow on so that I may go on.

The single most lesson I learned was to pay attention to the signs. Just because the doors are open, doesn't necessarily mean the "place" is fully functional.

Getting TOO Personal

2011-04-06T09:01:00.000-05:00

One of my issues of communication, is that I am "some timey" I will admit that, and have. You may catch me on a good day and I am all talk. A little flirty and overly informational. I am however, honest. And will not hold back on what must be stressed and or addressed. If at any time I don't respond, I'm either unavailable, or you have caught me at an inopportune time.

The one thing that I have grown to despise is that freakin IM (Instant Messenger). That thing can be a gateway to all things personal. It is one of the first things "some men" ask for in an initial conversation. Yea it makes for quicker communication. But once you give that ID out, your privacy is often invaded unless you are "ghost" which I often am, I'll admit. By the way, I always tell someone at first, "I'm hardly ever on there and am really not into using it". Nor and especially that darn web cam. My main use of the "msngr" is to be alerted of anticipated mail.

Lately I've shut it off all together. One reason being that I have to now respect my "family" time. I have no problem exchanging an occasional hello, or a note or so between web sites in which I frequent. I may even make or respond to a flirty comment. But hey, it's just a time passer. Please don't take it so serious. I can be a pretty good associate, I won't call it friend, because that term/meaning is way bigger than the word.

If you'd rather call me a tease. A mood buster. A seasonal flirt. A louse. What ever your choice of words consist of, I'm cool with it. I've already admitted and warned of my moodiness. So be it what it may. We'll all get over it right? Or maybe not. Either way, "IM" gonna continue to be me.

Keepin It "Real" Safe

2011-04-02T07:49:00.000-05:00

How far would you go to insure your safety. I'm not talking of direct criminal safety, but sexual safety.
I pull out all the stops where my health is concerned. I've done this a couple of times and if your partner,(new or old)has respect for you and his health, he or she should have no problem having regular check ups. Even producing visual test results to confirm his/her negative or positive findings.

I've requested and have successfully gotten my partner to accompany me to a local health facility to have such tests performed. Almost everyone has a not so pretty past. But there's no reason to keep repeating harmful practices. Finding someone you like, love and decide to spend quality time with, should be one you can share anything with.

Wearing a condom is one thing, but they do break. It's what lies beneath the break, that can do the most damage. Abstinence or monogamy are the only ways to prevent getting yourself all "dirty"

Don't be embarrassed. Don't be defensive. Be protected. Be certain. Be tested. For every possible life threatening STD imaginable. All it takes is a little time, that could make a life time of difference.

The Seven Day Commitment

2011-04-02T07:47:00.000-05:00

For seven straight days and nights
It's just you and me
We'll learn one another
I'll teach you of me
I'll further understand you
No one in
No one out
No phones No PC(arrrgg, very tough)
This is yours
That is mine
Ours is what we come up with
Selfish at first
Strange and new
Together
The entire 7
Balanced Emotions
Familiar Equations
Settling and Accepting
Wanting more each day
Sharing time and space
We were fun
We done it now what
Who are we
Did we commit to become us
I hope so
It's day 8
I like you just as much as you like me
Yes I still do
More Please

Show Me * I'm Receptive

2011-03-27T08:59:00.001-05:00

BeBe & CeCe Winans - Addictive Love

RIP Nathaniel Dwayne Hale, aka Nate Dogg

2011-03-16T07:45:00.001-05:00

August 19, 1969 – March 15, 2011
View his about status' on the link below
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nate_Dogg

Personally & Emotionally Me

2011-03-10T18:01:00.001-06:00

I don't like getting angry, but I do
I don't like crying, but I will in a heartbeat
I don't like premature assumptions, but I place them
I don't like being taken for granted, yet I am
I don't like crowds, yet I draw them
I don't like liars, but I've lied
I don't like haters, and I've hated
I don't like unfairness, I've slighted a few

I like to laugh and I do
I often cry when I'm happy
I like to form my own opinions
I am a good judge of character(sometimes)
I am painfully honest at times
I love so hard and easily
I love being desired
I crave knowledge and intelligence

I am a user
I am selfish
I am evil
I am judgemental
I am aggressive
I am overly suspicious

I am an abnegator
I am practical
I am expeditious
I am astute
I am agile
I am an enabler
I am Me emotionally

In a nutshell

2011-03-02T21:20:00.000-06:00

Goapele - Closer

Antwone Fisher

2011-02-27T13:53:00.000-06:00

I love this movie. My entire head let alone my face and eyes are always tear drenched throughout my consumings of it. It entails such relevancy and divergence.

The combination of the two life experiences, his against my own are equally overwhelming yet rewarding.

Moving Past Myself

2011-02-20T03:50:00.001-06:00

I have a very special friend that has told me to get out of my own way, and when I'm having an off day, don't listen to myself. Most times when we are consumed with negativity, it's due to our own insecurities and doubts. In all actuality we truly are our own worst enemies. Well I get it and have passed it on to others that are also perceived as their biggest obstacles. I'm surpassing all that I previously set for myself, as I know there's more to/for me than this or shall I say that. Yesterdays are lost so I'm gettin my today's and tomorrows in check.

**pushing myself away so I can get thru**

INDULGENT SMILES

2011-02-15T13:03:00.000-06:00

THANK YOU!

ICU Unit #324

2011-02-14T08:59:00.001-06:00

Comprehensive Medical Chart:
Effective Monday, February 14, 2011 9:59:59 AM
Female patient admitted on Thursday, February 10, 2011 9:59:59 AM

Patient complained early that morning of discomforts in her cardiac region; possibly brought on by the abrupt decision to sever connections to a major heart valve #415. The bleeding was stopped, however the pain was too much to bear and the patient collapsed. After reading from notes and sporadic etchings found in the residence, it is concluded that this is a clear case of heart break.

When asked if this was a fact, the patient wiggled her left finger to indicate a yes. A sign she's aware, not in a comatose state - yet in and out of consciousness. When asked if she regretted the decision to separate, she then wiggled a right toe to indicate a second yes. When asked if she wanted us to preserve the valve in hopes of repair for rekindling, there was a blink to suggest... yes. A specialist then enters to determine the chances of full and complete recovery by asking one more question. Can you ever love again?

Time progression of 2 minutes with a lapse in animated response by gesture of any limb, represents an uncertainty or wide probability of a No. She Rests

Habitual Resolutionists

2011-02-06T08:18:00.000-06:00

I'd been sentenced indefinitely but my release date is at hand.
The repetition of self promises written, erased and re-canted are
as disabling as the habit and or lifestyle we want to denounce.
It's like we validate the temporary slippage because we know as
the year turns, likewise does our habit of starting over. We
again eat, drink, smoke, spend, indulging in an extreme use of profanity or whatever we know is a hindrance.

Saying it all to say I'm just gonna live and remain conscious of my behaviors and correct those that limit my growth concluding only with complete satisfaction, however long it takes.

Much Too Cold

2011-01-29T20:07:00.000-06:00

Stevie Wonder - Rocket Love

I've been in quite the melodious mood lately.
Music indeed soothes and calms a slighted soul.

Urban Mystic - In The Morning

2011-01-26T18:08:00.000-06:00

Suddenly I have a desire to ponder the mornings...

hmmm... ahhh the momeries

Oh well I'll keep the good good to myself!

Happy Birthday Daddy

2011-01-14T08:33:00.002-06:00

May you rest in eternal peace.

Love infinity,
Angela

Shhh

2011-01-12T05:21:00.002-06:00

Just listen and take it all in...

*****************************************************

Sold Out

2011-01-11T02:55:00.001-06:00

There are no more passes

No more advances

Not one free ride

You've exhausted your chances

Some things we say are taken for granted

We hope that you believe us

While thinking this could all be true

What your table displays is malicious

To think that I would sit real still
And wait until you were ready
Is such a belittling insulting ordeal
That overwhelms me to an extent of heavy

As I move on to my initial plans

Which suddenly does not include you

I wish for you whatever it is

That can ultimately satisfy or subdue you

My putting this here in open sight
Is not my way of a challenge

My only intent is to toss out some words

Sorta lessening my imbalance

My only regret is a parcel post

To introduce me to your palate

Nothing to do with you so much

But an ill representation of my talent

For all the things I've showed you

For as long as this went on

I was completely and authentically me

And for the shot I gave it... so long

If It's Love

2011-01-06T13:08:00.002-06:00

MY VERSION...

It doesn't Lie
It doesn't Cheat
It doesn't Fade
It doesn't get Bored
It doesn't Compare
It Sticks Around
It Shares
It Toughs it out
It Finds a way
It Lasts A Lifetime
Etcetera

KEMS VERSION...

RIP & TOGETHERNESS

2010-12-26T23:29:00.000-06:00

YES I AM

2010-12-26T14:45:00.001-06:00

Hil St. Soul - Sweet on You

Im Ready Too

2010-12-22T05:18:00.001-06:00

Fantasia's version - "Teach Me"

Depiction Of The Palm Tree

2010-12-19T09:00:00.000-06:00

The righteous shall flourish like the palm tree: he
shall grow like a cedar in Lebanon.

Psalm 92:12
King James Version

___________________
My Version
I can be bent but never broken
You may push me but I won't turn
I may stumble but will not fall
You may grab me but you can't hold me
I will make bad decisions yet overcome them
You may direct me but you can't guide me

I am of the palm tree
Nothing can deter me
Destined to form what is set for me

Me, aka Angie, Multitalented1, Ms Cheeky

Yesterday 12-12-2010

2010-12-13T07:29:00.000-06:00

Yesterday started out just fine with the exception of my eating in excess. I talked with those that are important to me and had fond memories(some not so fond) of those I did not speak with. Hours passed and as I tryed to move into a bit more normalcy with the eating, I received a call that was much bigger and significant to anything I could imagine or attempt to overcome.

Yesterday I lost my father. Yesterday another family member called to say I'd lost my father. It should have been news we'd all received at the same time while we gathered at his bedside to say our goodbyes and just be together. In a shorter phrase... he died alone. He passed over and through to his final resting stages alone.

I recalled events that occurred in our lives. I made contact with other members of our family and my close friends. I appeared to be fine or as well as to be expected given the circumstances. I held up for them long enough to deliver.

I expelled an enormous degree of grief yesterday and today I am only in acceptance that we all have the same destination. Meaning I'm coping but I'm not.
I wish he was here. I wish I was there yesterday.

Mr. Walter L. Davidson
1/14/1945 - 12/12/2010

This Morning

2010-12-05T04:38:00.001-06:00

I thanked the Lord for waking me.
I awoke to find some things that mattered to me.
That thing that mattered most to me, was me.
I had thoughts of the night before.
Memories I pondered as I drifted off to sleep.
A workout would suffice today as well as yesterday.
My focus had been broken, but the track is back on.
Within the first 10 minutes of waking, I felt anger.
The duration of my anger was about 5 of those minutes.
I said to myself, "self" "Those things you can not change
Are things that should not matter."
The things I can, should take precedence.
I quickly jumped to my feet.
Cleansed my body and mind.
Took a deep breath, shook the confusion.
And again thanked God, for reminding me that I mattered.
Especially if it doesn't appear as such.
I won't let the little things, keep me from the big ones.
Something good happened inside me, it was...
This morning

Just Enough

2010-11-28T09:53:00.000-06:00

Embrace what you have and where you are today.

It's your catalyst to a better tomorrow!

Understand

2010-11-20T06:19:00.000-06:00

my version:

I'm just an ordinary girl. You may meet me today and I am the epitome of perfection. See me next week and perhaps my hair isn't done. No I do not spend dollars and cents on up and over do's. I do my own hair when it's necessary and or feasible, for I know the power of a good wig or cute ass hat.

I'm not high maintenance. Sure you thought that when you saw my medi-pedi in flawless order. I must've been expecting you. I'm also the designated groomer of my nails and feet and well uh, you know the rest. I won't do chipped polish on the nails, I just take it all off and trust me they won't be filed in synchronized order either. I keeps the heels smooth but I fair likewise on the toe nail shaping. Who really gives change for a fuqq about that. Won't find that here. Not regularly anyway.

You will always find me clean and attractively scented. Or u won't be near enough to notice otherwise.

No alternative to that.

Lastly but certainly most definitely and most of all more importantly; I was the nicest, sweetest, softest lil mama you've ever met. Well that was yesterday and now you're introduced to another me. I'm not the first female you've encountered. That evil, moody, contradicting, emotional resemblance to your female family members ie., mom, sis, aunt flaky nem... yep we all have unwarned multi emotional flaws.

It's the way of the girl.

Like it or leave it!

Dwele's version:

Just A Prose

2010-11-10T06:47:00.002-06:00

Why is the truth a bad word? No one speaks it and no one can accept it! I desire to tell, live and know the truth, no matter how damaging! I believe simple honesty up front is the best way to go. The only pain it causes, is when it's not openly present and later rears it's head as a slice of deception, not easily consumed by the best of us. Now there is no choice but to toss it out...
liars have an abrupt expiration date with me!

Sigh...

2010-11-09T04:38:00.002-06:00

Deborah Cox - Nobody's Supposed To Be Here

Deciphering

2010-11-06T12:46:00.001-05:00

How do I figure, sum, calculate your measure you're so different, remarkably intriguing. Your execution is like none other yet it's received with a comfortable familiarity. A cherished likeness to mine own and that of interesting reads and wants. Your way is what I need. You're not all together complex but have shown up in a place that had been missing from my perimeter of beings. No one says that, no one challenges that, no one soothes this. I mean other than a dream you keep on dreaming in hopes that a reality is near, no one presents like you. For me to sit amidst your words and ways is my benefit. I do that, I say that, I reflect this and you own it so well. Now tell me, not to compromise your integrity but tell me, don't you feel it too? You say you love me but you can't possibly love me as much as I love you. There's no way. If the sky's the limit, you must be up there, surpassing it looking down at my approach. Naw... there's no way you could possibly get the gains I hold just from thinking of you. Sometimes I can ....
[ding ding ding] "Please pass your essays forward" Shit...

You completely throw me. I messed up. An F for incompletion.
The essay was to be about power, I gave it all to you. Maybe I should turn this in.
It's sort of the same thing right?

TODAY

2010-11-02T18:25:00.003-05:00

Arrived at the polling spot early this morning looking casually fly. Had a lil bounce in my step that was fueled by my confidence and the fact that I show up systematically to make my "mark". I see some folks outside. These are usually the folks that may hand you literature on whom they wish you'd select.
Nope nothing... For the 27 years I've been voting someone usually has something. Not today.

As I became within an ears reach of em, I gleefully said, "g'morning". Nothing... not a word. [shrug] I'm going in, donning a smile anyway. Get inside no one's around except the polling volunteers. "G'morning"... Nothing. Again, no one says a word. I scan the trail of signs along the table to see if they were significant to last name initials or such... Nothing. So I gaze upon them all and say, "Smith". One of the "workers" raised her head from a slumber and said, "Camille?" I veered in her direction and said, "no". I showed another my ID and she said, "hmmm, what's the red heart stand for?" "It means I'm a donor". I looked at the card directly at the heart that was just beneath the word donor to make sure it was still visible. Yep.. there it is.
Confirmed my information; still smiling, I took the candidate listing slip, made my marks.

As I submitted the ballot, I was handed a sticker which indicated my status per today's visit. Waited to see the number count turn to 65. I Affixed the sticker immediately because somehow I felt as if they all wished I hadn't shown up. Well I did. I wore my action proudly upon my chest all day and will now remove it to retire for the evening. Today was a good day, in spite of!

Pick Your Corner (Nov. 2nd)

2010-10-31T07:38:00.001-05:00

I've been registered and have voted ever since I was 19. I'm not sure how I felt back then, having the right to do so; however, now I feel as if I'm a major part of something. Even if my candidate of choice does not win, I know that just as many opposers went out with the same intentions. To be included.

It surprises me how many people have never voted. How many people aren't registered. Yet, those are the very people who stomp around saying, "The winner sucks". Or, "I demand a recount". Wow, no matter how many times a recount would be performed, there's no way at all, that a "sleeper", will aid in producing a better outcome. Which at this point, would be too late.

No, I'm not a very political person. Yes I dislike having so many campaign flyer's crowd my mailbox. But I do read them, in an attempt to make a fair decision. I've even worked at polling sites well into the night. That was not a problem, I was making sure everyone was given fair honest recognition.

In conclusion, don't be so quick to yell foul, if you're not a part of the fight. Vote for someone, anyone.